Waiting Game

Well, 40weeks+..it's now a waiting game for Peter. I still have prodromal labor, lots of it! But that isn't news to me at all. I have come to terms that I will just be that lady that has annoying prodromal labor all the time. This time around I also have been eating dates so maybe that will help my labor. Time will tell.

At my appointment yesterday I expressed concerns that he was moving much less for the past couple days (babies still move a lot before they come, just movement change. I wasn't even feeling him during the day and only right before bed for a short time). Babies hate monitors so that got him moving really quick! Everyone was more interested in my contractions. I think they were convinced I was going to have the baby that day! haha. I just laughed and told them my contractions have always been regular time intervals no matter how hydrated I am...it's the normal for me. I refuse cervical checks (my doctors don't do them unless I want them anyways), so I don't know if the contractions are doing anything and honestly, it doesn't matter. Women came go from being thick and not dilated to having the baby in the same day or alternatively, be walking around at a 4 and have the baby a month later.

This past week has been us trying (key word trying) to keep up with all the annoying chores you have to do daily and also taking Nathan out as much as possible. We went to the zoo and the children's museum and we spend a lot of our time on walks, at parks, or enjoying our backyard (we have a sprinkler, baby pool, and sandbox he loves). We even got our garden in this year!

I am fairly excited for labor. I am ready for Peter to come. Nathan is still cutting his canines and they are bothering him, but I think the worse of that teething is over (and he is back to being his sweet self most of the time. Can I say how much I love Nathan "fish" kisses?). I am ready to see Nathan as a big brother. I am ready as I will ever be for recovery (my past recovery was hell, absolute hell to be blunt).

I have prayed hard for Nathan to be kept safe and protected while I leave him in the care of others while Daniel and I go through the intimate process of bringing our next child to this world. I have been filled with peace that all will be as it should be and we will be alright. Fear of the unknown is one of my biggest fears, but what I have come to love (and hate at times) about pregnancy and childbirth, is that it really isn't in your hands. Yes, you can prepare for all circumstances and educate yourself, but in the end, I have to leave everything in God's capable hands.

I love the book "the Gift of Giving Life." I often read it during my precious down times, but I can only read a few short chapters before I am on the verge of crying because I feel the peace and love from my Savior so strongly. I can't wait to go into labor again and feel this perfect love profoundly. I can't wait to feel angels holding me up in my deepest time of need just like an angel supported our Savior in the Garden of Gethsemane. How grateful I am for the Gospel and knowledge I do have.

Daniel recently gave me a night alone in a hotel in order for me to sleep (Nathan had been waking up every hour the entire week and I needed to have a night with little disturbances). I ended up staying up later that night reading the scriptures and I must of read the account of Jesus blessing the Nephite children more than I ever have. That chapter filled me with joy that our children are loved and cherished in more ways then we will ever know. It made me feel closer to Peter than any time in the pregnancy and it was that moment I began feeling ready to tackle the challenges of being a mom of two earthly children.

So now we wait!