Busy, busy, busy! That is what June and this week are all about. Yes, I stay home all day, but in the evenings we are busy running errands, taking classes, meeting with people, and just a lot of overwhelming stuff.
This week is particularly busy for Daniel. He has recently taken on another job (working BYU security) along with his full time internship at Wavetronix. This week he is clocking nearly 30 hours for the security job along with his 40 hours of his internship. This won't be the norm because not every week is Independence week. He is working Stadium of Fire and this also does not just involve the actual event, but working security the week of the event to make sure hooligans aren't getting in the way! Other weeks should be much more settled down and we are looking forward to the calmer times. I am just so grateful for how dedicated he is to help our family. I am grateful that I have a motivated husband who is willing to do all he can so that Nathan and I will not struggle in the future. So even though I am saddened that I will not see him much this week (except for our 10 minute hustle to find and get his uniform on for a last minute shift) I am still extremely happy for his dedication.
I am also happy he is busy because July is a month of sad one year anniversaries for us. Tomorrow (July 3, 2013) was the day I started bleeding in my first pregnancy. We had an emergency ultrasound and discovered our baby was just fine, just measuring a little smaller, but not small enough for doctors to be terribly concerned. Though I know my cycles are clockwork and had a bad feeling. We ended up cancelling our trip to Boston last year because of our 50% chance to miscarry. July 10th was the day I held my first baby in my hands. He was so tiny, but perfect to me. It was the day I learned that emotional pain could be just as severe as physical pain. I never cried so hard in my life. I can't believe it has been a year. Time has gone by so quickly and I feel like my life has just been wasting away.
I was originally going to apply for grad school at BYU and start this September 2014. But after the second miscarriage I lost all motivation to take the GRE and fill out applications. I originally thought Daniel and I were going to stay in Utah for years and settle down...but I guess God has different plans for us. If we hadn't lost our two babies then Daniel would have never been able to accept a job in Wisconsin because I would have begun grad work in Utah. Amazing how things turn out. Though I am sad my education is put on hold for a while. I probably won't do grad work until we are done having kids, but that isn't bad. I will just be a 30+ old PhD candidate and that is completely fine. I would love to do research at an university and be home in time for when the kids come home from school. I do want to stay home with the kids until the youngest is old enough for elementary school (bonding and no paying for day care). I guess I am learning a lot about family sacrifices this year. I am, once again, just grateful that Daniel is a hard worker and doesn't need to get more education to get a decent job (Geology is quite different if you have a family or don't want to work a ridiculous grunt job).
On a happier note, Nathan has been wonderful as always. The pregnant belly is getting bigger everyday, but I am barrel shaped so I am not popping out all in front, but I am on the sides (goodbye waist). He turned breech, but he still has a while to turn back (fingers crossed he doesn't get too comfortable and never turns). I have a lot of things I can do to encourage him to flip so I am not too worried yet. My belly button is still in but looks funky. I can still wear my rings unless if I am out in the heat for too long. I didn't get any stretch marks until a couple weeks ago, but they are just my love scars or my tiger stripes (as Daniel fondly calls them). The baby is growing so quickly these days so I would have been surprised if I never got a stretch mark. Now that I am taking iron supplements I am feeling more energetic and even sleeping better because my restless leg syndrome is not as bad. That's about all I have to ramble about right now.
No comments:
Post a Comment